Ask the Queens Advice Card Deck

“It’s better to be alive without a crown than dead with one.” – Kris Waldherr

Based on her artfully designed book Doomed Queens, the Ask the Queens Advice Card Deck delivers historical wisdom from beyond the grave in the form of deceased female royalty.

From Princess Diana to Empress Wang, Queen Zenobia to Eva Peron each ruler offers “advice” on topics from ambition and religion, to romance and career. Measuring approximately 5 ¾ x 4 ½ inches, these large cards depict an oval portrait of each queen spouting pithy advice from a talk bubble, while a brief paragraph at the bottom introduces the figure and explains her advice.

Some royal insights by Kris Waldherr as found on the Ask the Queens Advice Cards include:

Queen Caroline Matilda: “Don’t Look to Your Doctor to Heal Your Disappointments” – Caroline Matilda was married by her brother, George III of England, to Christian VI of Denmark. Alas, Christian was raving mad. Caroline used the opportunity to fall in love with his hunky physician and take over the throne. The lovers were thrown into prison. Eventually Caroline was released and exiled to Germany, where she died from scarlet fever in 1775.

Diana Spencer says: “Avoid Men with Cameras and Camillas” – The marriage of Diana Spence to Charles, Prince of Wales, was doomed from the start. Though the couple divorced, Diana’s popularity bloomed to absurd heights, thus making her a queen of hearts. She used her celebrity to campaign against landmines and AIDS. However, Diana was killed in a car accident in 1997 while being pursued by paparazzi.

Queen Urraca says: “Biology Can Be a Bitch” – Urraca was the queen of Castille and Leon: these two kingdoms was [sic] set in what is now Spain. Urraca was as a passionate in love as she was in war. The Historia Compostelana, a history of that era, relates that Urraca got [sic] knocked up by a love and perished in labor. At the time of her death in 1126, the queen had reached the advanced maternal age of forty-six.

At times clever (and crude), the Ask the Queens Advice Card Deck is a nice novelty deck for those interested in female royalty. As you can see from the above example, there are egregious grammatical errors, but that won’t stop history buffs from enjoying this deck.

With its attractive plum-colored flip-top box, these cards would make a lovely gift for those wanting to learn more about queens. However, if you’re looking for an actual oracle deck, you’ll find little practical and applicable wisdom in these cards.